"Today, I decided to be my own best friend."
My Story
On Becoming My Own Best Friend
As a child and young adult, I struggled to find my path within a broken family. I was eventually relegated to the foster care system. Because of my unconventional upbringing, I didn't have the emotional tools to work through my grief and anger. Diagnosed with depression in 2001 after the loss of my grandmother, who was my source of safety, I entered the process of daily medications and weekly therapeutic alliance. Two years later, I was still unable to cope and self-regulate. Seeking a better path, I found my first yoga class. Breath Work and Guided Meditation were also components of my new practice. Due to physical activity and finding a connection with a community, I discovered that I could sit with an emotional aspect during meditation. These first steps toward healing were nurtured through my community.
In 2011, I traveled across the world to Mysore, India to be trained by a yoga master. I had never traveled alone and was ready to explore…to deepen my love for yoga and meditation. The journey changed me in ways I had not imagined. From the first moment I stepped off the plane, I had to learn to trust myself. The moment that my heart first began to open was during a meditation. I cried and hated myself for being there, for being me, for being Melanie the poor girl from Indiana who had no father, a mother who didn’t love her enough to get clean, and a grandmother who departed too early and left me all alone.
That deep despair was followed by a clarity and acceptance I had never experienced before. I was Melanie the warrior, the survivor, the daughter, the granddaughter, mother, but most of all I had discovered the first glimmer of becoming my own best friend. I was home. My life has never been the same since that sitting and for that, I am blessed.
I began studies with a Zen Master with Five Mountain Zen Order and entered into seminary in 2012. Within seminary, my formal training in Mindfulness, Zen practice, Buddhist studies, Koan practice, and clergy studies expanded my vision of what a meditation practice could be.
I am grateful to the teachers who have guided me along my path. I did my clergy training with the Ven. Sunyananda while attending seminary at Five Mountain Zen Order. I was honored to be his student for he is a brilliant teacher and a compassionate man.
My formal Zen teacher, Venerable Charama Bhavika taught me what it meant to have a direction with my spiritual practice. He is the reason I became a Dharma teacher. I took precepts and was ordained under him. I learned to open up to other people through that relationship. A Zen teacher-student relationship is a very sacred bond.
I had seen Josh Korda (Dharmapunx, NYC) on a Tricycle retreat and instantly gravitated toward his teachings on addiction, neuroscience, and Buddhist psychology. We chatted through Facebook and I joined him at a sitting in 2013. He helped me deal with my mother's addiction and subsequent passing. That same year I founded a weekly sitting group called Open Door at Buddhamouse Emporium, a community center in Claremont, CA. Open Door moved to its current location in Pomona during August 2014 and I began formal mentoring with Josh Korda in August 2015. My neuroscience work with Josh has opened new facets of mindfulness.
Through my studies I have learned the tools and techniques needed to self- soothe, self-regulate emotions, increase self-awareness, and enhance interpersonal and intrapersonal relationships and conflict-resolution skills. I saw that I didn’t have to be anyone else but myself. True spiritual practice is finding great comfort in one's own skin. It is my goal to help others achieve this goal.
“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.”
-Thich Nhat Hanh
As a child and young adult, I struggled to find my path within a broken family. I was eventually relegated to the foster care system. Because of my unconventional upbringing, I didn't have the emotional tools to work through my grief and anger. Diagnosed with depression in 2001 after the loss of my grandmother, who was my source of safety, I entered the process of daily medications and weekly therapeutic alliance. Two years later, I was still unable to cope and self-regulate. Seeking a better path, I found my first yoga class. Breath Work and Guided Meditation were also components of my new practice. Due to physical activity and finding a connection with a community, I discovered that I could sit with an emotional aspect during meditation. These first steps toward healing were nurtured through my community.
In 2011, I traveled across the world to Mysore, India to be trained by a yoga master. I had never traveled alone and was ready to explore…to deepen my love for yoga and meditation. The journey changed me in ways I had not imagined. From the first moment I stepped off the plane, I had to learn to trust myself. The moment that my heart first began to open was during a meditation. I cried and hated myself for being there, for being me, for being Melanie the poor girl from Indiana who had no father, a mother who didn’t love her enough to get clean, and a grandmother who departed too early and left me all alone.
That deep despair was followed by a clarity and acceptance I had never experienced before. I was Melanie the warrior, the survivor, the daughter, the granddaughter, mother, but most of all I had discovered the first glimmer of becoming my own best friend. I was home. My life has never been the same since that sitting and for that, I am blessed.
I began studies with a Zen Master with Five Mountain Zen Order and entered into seminary in 2012. Within seminary, my formal training in Mindfulness, Zen practice, Buddhist studies, Koan practice, and clergy studies expanded my vision of what a meditation practice could be.
I am grateful to the teachers who have guided me along my path. I did my clergy training with the Ven. Sunyananda while attending seminary at Five Mountain Zen Order. I was honored to be his student for he is a brilliant teacher and a compassionate man.
My formal Zen teacher, Venerable Charama Bhavika taught me what it meant to have a direction with my spiritual practice. He is the reason I became a Dharma teacher. I took precepts and was ordained under him. I learned to open up to other people through that relationship. A Zen teacher-student relationship is a very sacred bond.
I had seen Josh Korda (Dharmapunx, NYC) on a Tricycle retreat and instantly gravitated toward his teachings on addiction, neuroscience, and Buddhist psychology. We chatted through Facebook and I joined him at a sitting in 2013. He helped me deal with my mother's addiction and subsequent passing. That same year I founded a weekly sitting group called Open Door at Buddhamouse Emporium, a community center in Claremont, CA. Open Door moved to its current location in Pomona during August 2014 and I began formal mentoring with Josh Korda in August 2015. My neuroscience work with Josh has opened new facets of mindfulness.
Through my studies I have learned the tools and techniques needed to self- soothe, self-regulate emotions, increase self-awareness, and enhance interpersonal and intrapersonal relationships and conflict-resolution skills. I saw that I didn’t have to be anyone else but myself. True spiritual practice is finding great comfort in one's own skin. It is my goal to help others achieve this goal.
“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.”
-Thich Nhat Hanh
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My Belief / My Teaching / Training Approach
My unconventional upbringing, loss of attachment figures, and clinical depression, has taught me lessons on emotional regulation and growth. Because of this I feel called to work with struggling populations. I can relate with an open heart to those who have tragically suffered. The teachings and the tools I share with students will increase their ability to live full and healthy lives, to shed their armor and become their own best friend.
“And the day came when the risk it took to remain tightly closed in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to bloom.”
-Anais Nin
When Working With Me
We will learn basic and advanced tools in…
Meditation: an exercise for the brain to help train the mind to be concentrated, relaxed and present.
Breathwork: attention to and experience of natural breathing patterns to help reduce stress, clear the mind, focus, calm and center.
Mindfulness: maintaining awareness of the present moment, and one's thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, and surrounding environment without judgment.
Power of pause: the power inherent in the stillness and space between stimulus and response, both physical and mental. It is a suspension of activity to become wholly present and attentive.
Becoming responsive vs. reactive: developing the ability to be in the moment, to listen, to pause and respond skillfully rather than react impulsively.
Communication skills both interpersonal & intrapersonal: Interpersonal communication is the face-to-face exchange of information, feelings, and meaning through verbal and non-verbal messages including tone of voice, facial expressions, gestures and body language.
Intrapersonal communication is self-talk. It may include internal dialogue or written personal communication, such as that in a diary or journal.
Relationship building: the ability to create connections with others through honesty, respect, and skillful communication.
Stress relief: strategies that restore physical, emotional, or mental balance and produce a sense of relaxation and harmony.
Self acceptance: the ability to recognize one’s strengths, weaknesses, and limitations, and embrace all elements of ourselves without judgment.
Letting go/letting in: letting go is letting things be as they are without attachment. Letting in is experiencing and embracing things as they are without judgment.
“And the day came when the risk it took to remain tightly closed in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to bloom.”
-Anais Nin
When Working With Me
We will learn basic and advanced tools in…
Meditation: an exercise for the brain to help train the mind to be concentrated, relaxed and present.
Breathwork: attention to and experience of natural breathing patterns to help reduce stress, clear the mind, focus, calm and center.
Mindfulness: maintaining awareness of the present moment, and one's thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, and surrounding environment without judgment.
Power of pause: the power inherent in the stillness and space between stimulus and response, both physical and mental. It is a suspension of activity to become wholly present and attentive.
Becoming responsive vs. reactive: developing the ability to be in the moment, to listen, to pause and respond skillfully rather than react impulsively.
Communication skills both interpersonal & intrapersonal: Interpersonal communication is the face-to-face exchange of information, feelings, and meaning through verbal and non-verbal messages including tone of voice, facial expressions, gestures and body language.
Intrapersonal communication is self-talk. It may include internal dialogue or written personal communication, such as that in a diary or journal.
Relationship building: the ability to create connections with others through honesty, respect, and skillful communication.
Stress relief: strategies that restore physical, emotional, or mental balance and produce a sense of relaxation and harmony.
Self acceptance: the ability to recognize one’s strengths, weaknesses, and limitations, and embrace all elements of ourselves without judgment.
Letting go/letting in: letting go is letting things be as they are without attachment. Letting in is experiencing and embracing things as they are without judgment.
Education, Trainings, Certifications and Endorsements
I am a Meditation and Dharma teacher in the Zen Buddhist tradition as well as in Insight Meditation (Vipassana). I was trained and ordained as a Buddhist monk while attending seminary, I also have had the great honor of being mentored by Josh Korda of Dharma Punx NYC.
Meditation and Mindfulness Educator with UCLA's Mindful Awareness Research Center (MARC)
at the Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Behavior~
Mindful Awareness Practices (MAPs) Teacher, UCLA, MARC
Accredited IMT (International Mindfulness Teacher) and graduate of the Facilitator Program at MARC within the UCLA Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Human Behavior.
I am an E-RYT 500 / YACEP®, and Director RYS® Meditation and Yoga Teacher Training School. I was trained and certified as a Yoga Therapy Instructor by Pranava Yogadhama’s master teacher and founder, Jayakumar Swamysree, in Mysore, India. My focus and specialty training includes Meditation, Prānāyāma, Sanskrit Chanting, Asana, and a Traditional South India practice.
Yoga Alliance, Registered Yoga Teacher 500-Hour, Pranava YogaDhama , Mysore, India
Experienced 500-Hour Registered Yoga Teacher (E-RYT 500), Yoga Alliance
Ordained, Zen Buddhist Monk, Five Mountain Zen Order
Meditation & Yoga Teacher Training School RYS 200 & RYS 300hr, Yoga Alliance
The Power Of Awareness, Tara Brach & Jack Kornfield
Mindfulness Facilitator Program at the UCLA Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Human Behavior
Meditation and Mindfulness Educator with UCLA's Mindful Awareness Research Center (MARC)
at the Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Behavior~
Mindful Awareness Practices (MAPs) Teacher, UCLA, MARC
Accredited IMT (International Mindfulness Teacher) and graduate of the Facilitator Program at MARC within the UCLA Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Human Behavior.
I am an E-RYT 500 / YACEP®, and Director RYS® Meditation and Yoga Teacher Training School. I was trained and certified as a Yoga Therapy Instructor by Pranava Yogadhama’s master teacher and founder, Jayakumar Swamysree, in Mysore, India. My focus and specialty training includes Meditation, Prānāyāma, Sanskrit Chanting, Asana, and a Traditional South India practice.
Yoga Alliance, Registered Yoga Teacher 500-Hour, Pranava YogaDhama , Mysore, India
Experienced 500-Hour Registered Yoga Teacher (E-RYT 500), Yoga Alliance
Ordained, Zen Buddhist Monk, Five Mountain Zen Order
Meditation & Yoga Teacher Training School RYS 200 & RYS 300hr, Yoga Alliance
The Power Of Awareness, Tara Brach & Jack Kornfield
Mindfulness Facilitator Program at the UCLA Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Human Behavior